The Elephant in the Room is Standing on my Head!

Editor's Note: Jenna Bradley is a sales rep who sells MRI's. Her sales career is in the toilet because the economy has taken a devastating toll on her sales but more importantly, her mind. As she struggles to regain her footing, she will learn what it takes to become great again.

Well, my conference call was as boring as two turtles on xanax trying to race each other. I actually can't remember a thing that was said during the call except that using a Powerpoint during our presentations to prospects will "drive sales." The rep from Arkansas asked, "Drive them where?" I'm sure right now his manager is driving him over to human resources. Funny, no one mentioned the economy. The elephant in the room takes a giant dump and I'm the only one who seems to smell it.

What your mind can achieve, it can believe! I try to focus but my focus is being driven by fear and I decide that can't work. What am I afraid of? Losing my house, my boss Shrek putting me on probation, looking like a dumbass to my friends and colleagues. What I'm really afraid is that I never knew how to do this job in the first place and I'm really a big, fat fraud. Well, I'm actually not fat but it's possible I am a fraud. And then I decide, no, I'm actually very good at what I do. Great, in fact. I'm just in a slump that's going to get me sent back to the minors if I can't snap myself out of it.

I turn on my computer and write an action plan. It consists of everything I think I need to do in the next 30 days to sell a system. I use all the old numbers that used to get me to my goal and multiply by 3. I convince myself that if I would actually start my day at 8am, instead of 10am, these numbers won't really be that difficult. I will plan each day the night before, including who I am going to call.My plan appears brilliant and if my arms were longer, I'd pat myself on the back. Instead I decide to pour myself a drink and turn on the TV.

Trouble. The swine flu is spreading and I don't have any hand sanitizer. Joe Biden thinks confined places and air travel are a bad idea. I think Foot and Mouth disease is more contagious. I'm glad I don't sit in meetings with him. I switch off the TV.

I think I'll workout in the morning. I haven't set an alarm in years. Do I even have an alarm? I realize there is one thing missing in my plan. I realize even if I had solid 30 prospects, how would I address the economy with them? My prospects are so familiar with the elephant, they probably have names picked out for him. Tomorrow I'm going to call a friend of my dad's. He's probably the wisest man I've ever known. He'll know how to handle that. I would call Shrek but he's probably getting his ears polished.

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